When faced with pie related decisions, I always consult my Pierarchy*.
1. The Pierarchy is to be used to determine which of two available pies to eat.
1a. The Pierarchy is not meant to deal with pies containing meat due to the fact that I don't ever have to deal with pies containing meat. Pot pies do not require the Pierarchy since there are rarely a variety of pot pies available.
2. In the case of only one pie being offered, that pie should be eaten based on the fact that it is pie.
3. A pie which has some sort of nut as a main component of its filling is placed at the bottom of the Pierarchy.
4. A pie which has cream as a main component of its filling is the next closest to the bottom of the Pierarchy.
5. The remaining pies are ordered based on the average height at which the main filling component grows above the ground. The closer that the main filling component is to heaven, the higher the pie is placed on the Pierarchy. Thus, ground dwelling fruits (e.g. pumpkins) are lower than shrub dwelling fruits (e.g. blueberry), which are themselves lower than tree dwelling fruits (e.g. apples).
6. In the case of two pies being at the same level in the Pierarchy, both pies should be eaten.
* This is a personal Pierarchy and may not be applicable to everyone.
Tuesday, March 19th, 2002
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